racism

JUST EAT DIRT

On the 14th August I had a couple of medical appointments, one just before lunch and another straight after. I skipped breakfast so when I returned after the first appointment I ordered some food and a coffee via Just Eat. I won’t include the name of the establishment for the time being as they know where I live.

I had a notification telling me the food was on its way. It’s an 8 minute drive from the restaurant to my house but on this occasion the driver seemed to be taking his time. 15 minutes had passed and I was sat on the edge of my seat, I hate taking deliveries when I’m expecting them, I can think of nothing else. Eventually the buzzer rang and I answered.

“FOOD” a male voice blared at me. I was startled at his tone, they’re usually very polite, identifying themselves as delivery drivers and asking if I’d in fact ordered food. I felt uneasy not least because I find men threatening (and so do most women if they’re honest) and this guy had shown aggression before I’d even said hello. I buzzed him in even though I was hesitant to, and figured if he was genuinely scary I would be my most charming self and kill him with kindness, a thing I used to do all the time growing up around white people, when one could never be sure whether this white person was a friend or a foe.

He seemed a bit unsure of himself when he saw my face and handed over the food, like he’d expected someone else. I guess when he looked at my name on the receipt he imagined he’d find someone in a hijab, there’s no mistaking the roots of my historically very Islamic name. He was a little less brash when he responded to my soothing gratitude, and then he was gone.

I took a little sip of my coffee to check if I needed to reheat and sugar it and then got the sugar and proceeded to add it to my coffee, using a long tea spoon to stir it up from the bottom. It wasn’t particularly hot but then I like my hot drinks warm, and it wasn’t so milky that a skin would form, nor was it frothy, just a plain Americano with a dash of cold milk.

Imagine my confusion/disgust/anger when I found this on the spoon.

I was sickened and immediately called Just Eat who advised me to leave a review raising my concerns with the restaurant and they would investigate and respond to my complaint within 72 hours. After a week or so of waiting I decided to contact them again and spoke to them via their internet chat service. They apologised for not getting back to me and said they would have it resolved within 72 hours and asked for photographic evidence (which I had already sent).

They were more efficient this time, getting back to me within minutes and said they were doing their investigation and should fulfil their promise of a refund, as I was advised by them when I first complained. A short while later I received this.

So I replied:

So here we are. Just Eat didn’t respond to my last email and I’m sharing it with you. See, this is what we mean by white privilege, when we say even working class white folk have the edge over us, because they don’t have to worry someone is interfering with their food. Poc are attuned to the way the air changes when you’re in close proximity to a racist. How they need not say a word or even give you a glare, when most won’t even make eye contact in all fairness, to get the sense that this person hates you unreasonably just for the colour of your skin or way your name sounds.

I will never forget the time a racist Irish guy tweeted at me that he was a farmer in Ireland and despite food safety standards forbidding the use of pig manure on vegetables, he would do it just to spite Muslims. That’s what racists want you see, for us all to be afraid at all times, to never know where the threat is in the crowd. I’m not personally bothered by any kind of manure but the twisted joy this ape got from telling me felt threatening.

We have to live like this and there are still people who would rather chastise me for rising up against it than tell the aggressors and no hopes to back the fuck off. If you had to question every decision you make a bunch of times, if you had to safety plan, and be left out of pocket instead of ‘causing a fuss’, and not for the first time, doing the most basic of fucking things, nourishing your body, wouldn’t you be a little bit angry and ‘unhinged’? £11.50 isn’t a lot of money but it is when you’re on a low income and marginalised by your disabilities.

I won’t be using Just Eat again. I mean, let’s face it, this isn’t the first time they fucked up, this is just the most appalling. Like other big name capitalist hell hounds Just Eat put profit before people of colour.

The Injustice of a Racist Britain

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White supremacy is in white people’s DNA. They’ve ruled the waves, they will never be slaves, they do the enslaving. From the toffs to the chavs they whip into a frenzy in the name of white skin, they all BELIEVE they are superior (unless they are actively dismantling white privilege and abolishing the structures that enable it).

You can show them evidence of white people’s crimes and they will minimise it, from the cops to the court system and beyond. The brutal murder and rape of Alesha McPhail at the hands of a 16 year old white male has been fairly muted compared to the sensationalist and somewhat salacious accounts being reported on the matter of jihadist teen brides keen to repatriate. No, I personally do not believe all should be forgiven and forgotten in cases such as these but I do not think we should be making children stateless (or anyone for that matter – NO BORDERS). If we can hide the identity of a 16 year old rapist and murderer who inflicted some of the worst injuries the police have ever seen on a 6 year old baby, a suspect who’s never shown any remorse, and continues to evade justice by perverting the course to it (he says the semen was planted on the child’s body by a vengeful Jezebel), then we can show compassion to a young person who was groomed into her role as a sort of useful idiot. There’s no confidentiality clause for young brown people when they are suspected of committing heinous crimes. No, not when 76% of Sun readers have made their minds up about letting her and the baby rot in their sorry refugee camp. With scenes from the BBC’s Bodyguard fresh in everyone’s minds, brown Muslim women are already condemned as traitors and terrorists, sly and sneaky. Why take the risk eh?

When Asian men groom young white girls everyone is up in arms (eventually) but their primary victims, their wives and daughters and mothers are fair game. Isis teen is born evil I guess, just like all the other darkies. Listening to her though, with the tiniest bit of compassion and understanding of the naive developing mind of a teenage girl (she was 15 years old when she was recruited) and not as an other but one of our own, born and bred, I can see only how she has been neglected and pushed to the limits by a society that has rejected her from the moment she was old enough to understand she was an other, and how easily a predator could have taken advantage of that. She appeals to the British public’s sympathy because that is the image we’re given of white people, they like to see themselves as magnanimous and she is aware of it, as we all are. Sadly I don’t think she actually believes it (as none of us do), but she’s desperate. She has given her newly born child the kind of protection she has never afforded herself. To her own detriment she is appealing for the safety of her child, as any mother would. She needs guidance and rehabilitation not spiteful retribution. People like Maajid Nawaz managed it but I have to wonder, is it because he routinely toes the British National party line on good and bad Muslims? Do you have to jump hoops to satisfy white interests? Swear allegiance to queen and country? A rhetorical question obviously, I can confirm this to be true.

Every day I see more evidence of white crimes, the likes of which chill you to the core and make you not want to step foot out of your front door or have your own children. I had a white lady anti vaxxer threaten to lick me, at one end of the batshit scale and read of threats to lynch women of colour MPs who dare to speak out against Brexit, down the other. I’ve had my own troop of white savages threatening to rape and kill me since a white journalist used an opportunity to deny racism was everywhere. Imagine if Helen Lewis had been sympathetic to our pleas all those years ago or any of her journalist friends instead of throwing us to their fascist following. Are we really going to let the media and politicians get away with the hellscape they’ve created?

Farage has recrutied 100,000 people to his newest fash party. Like all his other ventures into the mainstream this party has only one objective and that’s racism. He’s not building a legitimate party to win a war of words he’s putting together an army. He has threatened violence before. He has denied murderous violence, in the wake of the white supremacist slaying of Jo Cox in broad daylight. He is dangerous and should have already been blacklisted. Why hasn’t this happened?

The liberal/left wing media denied Britain was racist and turned everyone against the people who were trying to wake you up to this reality. Then they claimed antisemitism was the only racism any of us should pay attention to and rushed to the aid of European nationals threatened with repatriation under Brexit, whilst they quietly condemned the Windrush generation to deportation and destitution. They let brown foreign nationals die in hospitals from treatable diseases because their humanity is lost. Everywhere I look I see intense suffering of ethnic minorities and trauma that will span some generations to come and injustice wherever white people commit crimes.

To be a white supremacist is to be inhumane.

MAGA means NAZI

For weeks I have seen this image do the rounds, the hot takes, those for and against the respective parties and I’ve successfully managed to avoid learning anything about it at all. I don’t know the ‘facts’, I don’t have to, not when the narrative writes the pieces and we’re going through the motions, those who would defend the native elder did as they always would have done, and the usual suspects rallied around the white male. I don’t actually care what was said and by whom, over 70% of all communication is non verbal. I read this image with the knowledge of my ancestral history that is further coded in my DNA and informs my emotional responses. The smiling self-assuredness of an almost man wearing a maga hat, a symbol provoking thoughts of strange fruit and dead babies in cages on the border with Mexico, stands in the face of a native elder, holding his ground as only someone so entitled and shameless as a white man could. I don’t care who started it, what brought them to this stand-off, my comments are not open to clarifications.

We all know the image white men present, we know how they would like to be perceived. They’re smarter than us all, they know what’s best for us and they invented everything from the sciences to the arts, even though they had a period of time they refer to as the dark ages (which for us darkies was anything but). Muslims for eg invented poker, chess and alcohol, (whilst Europeans were bedding down in pig sties) arguably 3 of the most celebrated European pastimes but don’t tell Kevin that down the pub. White men don’t like smartarses.

When will we talk about the cognitive dissonance of white men? Maga chump knew what he was doing just like his ancestors did when they rocked up with furs and whiskey. That smile, it makes me very angry. I think maga gammon knows that it will upset non white people because that smile, we’ve seen it before, many times. It says I’m untouchable. It diminishes completely the status of anyone it is beamed at. White people don’t tend to respect their elders or care much for them either, not in the way non white cultures do. People of colour winced at this image because we know the white supremacist has no respect for age or innocence. It will kill our grandparents just like it will kill our babies. Any jumped up pubescent little shit can present themselves as master of the manor.

This Catholic white boy represents religious white men who annihilated entire peoples in the quest for white supremacy. His defenders are racist white supremacists. For every hot take gushing about his deference I see a narcissistic sociopath slapping themselves on the back for this untruthful world they’ve created. The white man exemplifies gaslighting. Wherever they went in the world, under cover of trade deals and friendship they presented themselves as civilised but manipulated warring factions to their own end. They poured fire on natives, literally and figuratively, to cleanse them of their idol worshipping ways and claim white supremacy. I do not see stoicism and good mannered patience, I see seriously twisted emotional detachment. I see a potential serial killer. I see genocide. I see narcissism and generations of unfettered sadism and the resulting intergenerational trauma these yobs can tap into with a flash of their pearly whites.

White men have killed this planet of ours in record time. Native cultures managed to survive well for 1000s of years before white supremacy sucked the world dry of its resources, creating a ripple effect that ultimately hurts people of colour first. A maga hat wearing devil sneering in the face of an earth loving native elder is a snapshot of the last 500 years. If you defend him you’re a racist, and you should probably work on that.

Britain’s Rejects

My 72 year old immigrant grandmother died in 2002, prompting a rushed visit to Pakistan. She had specified her wishes to be repatriated to her final resting place when the time came. Growing up we’d always objected to their pipe dream plans to show us the motherland, even going so far as likening it to death, given that we were never short of a cautionary tale or two of what could go wrong if they were not truthful of their intentions. There was always talk of so and so’s kid who’d gone off the rails so the folks took them ‘back home’ to straighten them out. This usually meant a forced marriage but there was always the worry you’d never return.

For 20 years I’d ignored their pleas to at least give them a chance and see what they had built with their own hands, for us, so that we had roots and a place we could always call home. My gran, or dhaadhi as we called her, would look at us in disbelief and shake her head, unsure of how else to sell it to us; the stories she’d tell of exotic fruits abundant in the courtyard, trees grown especially for us, her face wrinkled up in a smile as she recalled the exceptional quality of, as she put it, the juiciest mangoes on God’s green earth and other fruits I don’t know the English word for.

Whilst I love listening to her and seeing her clear delight I wasn’t convinced. I considered myself British, English even, and harboured an unhealthy self hate; I wasn’t above sneering at Pakis. Eager to set myself apart I believed the things white people said about Pakistan and Pakistanis and asserted my Britishness whenever it was required of me. I do cringe whenever I think back to that mindset. I think about the sort of white person who’d get off on hearing my disgust for people like me, the kind to collect tokens and play brown people off each other, dividing Muslims and Hindus for example and profiting off the misery that inevitably follows. Divide rule and conquer works to this day.

It didn’t matter when she died though, I suddenly felt I owed her a trip. Almost immediately I was consumed with guilt that I hadn’t honoured this wish of hers whilst she had been alive but I hoped she knew I was with her for her final journey. Barely six hours after she took her last breath we (my twin, dad, aunt and I) were in business class on a PIA flight bound for Islamabad. It was the first time I’d ever flown and my nerves were shot, I’d barely slept or processed what had happened but the hot cloths and silver service made up for the turbulence a little bit. My dad even let twin and I smoke a cigarette! It was that kind of a day, normal programming abandoned, venturing into the unknown out of a sense of duty and family pride. I tried not to think of her, alone, entombed in a wooden box, along with the rest of the cargo.

We landed at Islamabad airport at 6am. I was hit by the heat, as if I’d walked into a wall of hot air and it would suffocate me, upon exiting the plane. The sun hadn’t been up long but it was already 27 degrees. My thoughts went to my gran and the effect these conditions would have on her lifeless body. We waited for her coffin to be released and clung to each other through the chaos and din of the arrivals lounge, we weren’t in Kansas anymore. Random strange men pawed at our luggage offering to carry it, not being entirely forthcoming about the tip they expected for this service. It smelt funny, and the people were scary, staring at us as if we’d fallen from the sky. An uncle herded us out of the terminal and explained we looked different to regular Pakistanis and they were probably trying to figure out if we were worth anything.

It didn’t feel like a homecoming but the worst day of my life and the natives weren’t exactly helping. I didn’t want my worst fears to be confirmed, that we were easy pickings and could be disappeared, never to return. Dad’s cousin thought we were hilarious, batting furiously at the flies that seemed to throng the air, shrieking at the various creepy critters that had dared to greet us. We were a novelty. Fragile. Typical of desis who’d lost their way. A highly amusing form of entertainment for the locals.

The funeral was as expected; the outpouring of grief par the course but I had never imagined my dear gran knew so many people. I was bewildered by the number of women sat around smoking, a practice that was almost entirely gendered amongst the older generations in Britain. I only ever knew one lady smoker, my granddad’s sister in law and she had a free pass on account of her mental status. Here it just seemed to be a way of life, the chilum, similar to a shisha, was a permanent fixture. Granted they weren’t holding penis shaped cigarettes as they do in the west (cigarettes were originally marketed to women on the basis that women envied the penis and smoking would achieve equality or something) but this was really a sight to behold for someone who’d been brought up in a strict household where women most definitely did not smoke. I was also surprised at the relative freedom my girl cousins had with regards to their personal grooming. We’d been forced to keep our hair long, our eyebrows natural and our sleeves below the elbow and yet my cousins had no such restrictions. It’s when I first started to believe our grandparents were trying to preserve something of our culture in the west, that we were a snapshot frozen in time of an era pre colonialism whereas the rest of the world had just moved on.

They referred to us as the English princesses, for being so vulnerable to the elements. In our hurry to bury dhaadhi according to Islamic law within 24 hours, we’d had to forgo the usual preparations; shots for foreign diseases and the like. Within 48 hours we were struck with a mystery bug that was determined to shoot itself out of both ends and stifling temperatures in the mid 50s weren’t helping the situation, especially when the electricity was guaranteed to give out at least twice a day. I had never felt more miserable in my life and decided there was nothing else for it, we had to go home. Everyone else had other ideas though; we hadn’t given it a chance, we needed to eat more and think about getting better, the airline wouldn’t carry us if we were too sick and for a brief time I was petrified they weren’t going to let us leave at all. Maybe this had been the plan all along.

Fortunately the bug seemed to attack in waves and a day later our uncle took us shopping, we hadn’t come with very much stuff, in my case I didn’t even own more than one pair of salwar kameez. All was going well until we actually spoke to the vendors and my uncle clocked they were hiking up the prices. He said if we liked the look of anything to point at it rather than say anything aloud. I was confused, we’d been conversing in Punjabi but apparently even that sounded different to them and English people could afford to pay more.

I felt personally attacked, not gonna lie. I didn’t belong here, as people were keen to point out with every interaction. I didn’t like the heat, I didn’t like the food, or the people even, they were rude and looked at me the way closeted racists did in England. I didn’t feel safe. All I wanted was a cheese and tomato sandwich and my bed, at home in rainy blighty. I asked for fries on one occasion, thinking there isn’t a place in the world you can’t get fries, and bawled my eyes out when they arrived dusted with chilli powder. In the end, I shook off as much of it as I could and sliced up some tomato and onion for the weirdest chip butty ever. I dreamed of Nandos. I vowed to kiss the ground when I got home and never complain about the cold ever again (delirious or delusional, you decide) and made it my mission to pester the folks at all times, ET had to go home. Eventually, 10 days after the ordeal began we boarded a flight home, excited like you wouldn’t believe I made lists in my head of everything I would drink and eat.

I wasn’t sorry to say goodbye to my dysfunctional country of origin, but I did think of what it might be like, 50 years on. There’s no doubting Pakistan is a hellhole for many reasons but it was made this way. It was a consolation prize given to the victims of the British empire, those who once considered themselves Indian, those of my grandparents generation who would’ve been young children at the time of partition. They’ve seen horrors we can only imagine. They are the product of such horrors. To show humanity you must be shown it and Pakistanis are amongst some of the first to be dehumanised. They are the losers of the empire and all the alliances that followed, between extremists bound by mutual desires for power and control and must be mocked and denigrated in order to maintain the global hierarchy. They are Muslims and they were once proud rulers of India, loved by moderates of all faiths. Their fall from grace is the only lasting legacy for young Pakistan, it simply hasn’t had enough time to recuperate.

Our grandparents were refugees of a kind, the land they occupied was destroyed by the British who busted a dam, destroying everything. Britain promised those people refuge from a disaster of their own creation and so they came, naive to the racism that awaited them. They never accepted they were British, my grandparent’s generations, their hearts were too broken, unable to mend. Such is the life of the stateless citizen. I had tricked myself into believing I belonged in the UK but 9/11 changed all of that. The unspoken hate bubbled to the surface and became impossible to ignore. It’s gotten exponentially worse in recent years, there’s no denying it now. They say we don’t integrate but when we do they want to ban us from getting involved, just look at the furore over the Xmas ads, life is impossible for those of us who do not belong anywhere.

There’s no love lost between me and centrist Sadiq Khan but I felt for him today. We don’t belong anywhere, we only have an idea of what it is to belong somewhere and our place of birth is the nearest we can get to realising it, despite what the racists might say.

Toxic Twitter is for White Supremacists

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Yesterday I posted a tweet regarding the suicide of Carl Sargeant, who took his own life following allegations of sex abuse.

I stand by this tweet, at a time when media vultures are desperate to create a narrative that will help cover up the true extent of sex abuse in our society we must take it upon ourselves to maintain the truth even when it makes us uncomfortable. I wasn’t surprised when the usual suspects – white men – turned up in my mentions to tell me to go see how I liked it in Delhi, a nod to the gang rape a few years back and how I was a bitter woman and an attention seeker.

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I didn’t go looking for this man, just to be clear, he found my tweet and approached me just to say I was an attention seeker. I replied:

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I would suggest this was a fair enough rebuke given that he was doing exactly what he was accusing me of, seeking my attention. He went on to say:

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This random on the internet was just looking for an excuse to bully me and so I muted him after the swiftest of exchanges and thought nothing more of it. In fact I had many tweets attacking me for standing in support of victims of sexual violence:

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I can just imagine Alan wanking furiously to the thought of brown women being violated in foreign countries, it’s a fetish of his. He blocked me before I could report his account for targeted harassment and abusive behaviour aimed at my perceived race/religion etc.

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This is a perfect example of white power, subjected me to hateful language and harassment whilst claiming I’m the racist.

alanconalancourseOnly an entitled white male with zero self control/awareness would think it ok to suggest I give a shit at all about whether he finds me attractive or not. Never mind the infantilisation that comes with it, quite sickening when you think of it in the context of sex abuse. He thinks he’s attacking a girl, not a 35 year old woman and this makes it even more despicable.

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This take.. correct me if I’m wrong but isn’t the PIE filled with right wing establishment types, like prince Andrew’s best mate? As if I’ve ever made a distinction between the sorts of men I’d like to see dead and buried. ALL men are capable of sex abuse and ALL men must be held to account.

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White men do not care about victims of sexual violence, they object to non white predators. You can draw a parallel with the ‘coming over here, taking all our jobs’ trope, they’re only upset there are fewer victims for them. This is why you never see white men demand action against all predatory sex attackers.

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That’s SIR Jimmy Savile, 1300 child victims of sex abuse, and everyone knew about what he was doing but no one said a thing, not the BBC, nor the government or the mainstream media. A mentally ill sex pest who used his elite networks to abuse white children at whim but all is forgiven, the real issue is those darkies who’ve been hardwired that way. Timmeh’s account is live still despite directing hate at a group of people/members of a religion. What a fascinating double standard Twitter seems to operate.

Later in the day I went to log in to Twitter only to find myself locked out. The prat who’d said I was an attention seeker reported me for two tweets which I happily deleted upon being prompted by Twitter and yet my account was still restricted, effectively silencing me for a week as I am not able to tweet, RT, like or send media in my DMs. I can read my TL and I can send DMs to mutual follows.

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There are Nazis advocating genocide on Twitter but we must allow the marketplace of ideas for civilised debates even if that means inciting hatred and violence towards minorities but I can’t be hyperbolic and suggest a man eat his own weiner, what if I tracked him down and made him do it..?

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He sent me a tweet calling me an attention seeker and routed a bunch of other white supremacist misogynists my way and when I tried to return the favour (at which point I also muted his account because he wouldn’t stop tweeting at me) he reports me for abuse and I am punished for a week? I don’t think this is just crappy algorithms, in recent weeks I’ve seen many of the prominent woc I follow have their accounts suspended because they were reported by a fragile fuckin snowflake and Twitter has done nothing to rectify this. I don’t think the Twitter nerds are ignorant, I believe they are actively supporting white supremacy behind the scenes – wtf is the Trump account about? – but cannot sieg heil in public because nazism doesn’t pay, at least not this century.

Update: Twitter has verified the account of the Nazi who organised the Charlottesville klan rally where Heather Heyer was murdered by a white supremacist. Twitter is telling us what it is, it’s time we listened and accepted it.

 

Brexit was an opinion poll, nothing more

Brexit has caused ‘economic PTSD’!

Brexit has forced the Tories to retreat from austerity!

Brexit has broken everything.

Whilst these headlines are presented as facts they actually mean very little. What is economic PTSD? Do you suffer flashbacks to the EURef whenever your eye accidentally catches the Euro symbol on your keyboard perhaps? Maybe the Tories will start throwing cash at everything now, they couldn’t have foreseen the collapse of our economy, not even with all the world class economists on speed dial. Also, when they say Britain has broken *EVERYTHING*, define ‘everything’. Do they really mean ‘every’ ‘thing’ as in every little thing that ever existed? Or do they mean everything that exists to their knowledge, so anything outside their sphere of experience isn’t actually a ‘thing’?

I’ll tell you something else Brexit hasn’t caused; racism. In the days that followed the referendum racism became impossible to ignore, only because the racists widened the net to include Poles, other European ‘migrants’ and people who don’t ‘look Muslim’. Brexit did make one thing absolutely clear; Britain is racist, of this there can be no question now but did it actually cause the racist violence prevalent today on Britain’s streets? Of course not. The majority of people targeted by the far right have been Muslim and many thousands of these incidents occurred before Brexit, before Zac Goldsmith’s racist mayoral campaign, before the racist van even.

I was personally racially abused on a London bus in 2013. The passengers on the packed night bus sided with the racists on that occasion, it was a frightening experience for me and my white friend. When I shared the incident through social media right wingers and liberals alike decided I had no right to defend myself against racism and listed all the things they imagined had happened instead of my eyewitness account. In fact every time I spoke about racism on the internet I was either ignored or targeted in malicious campaigns to silence me. I reported racism to the police and they responded with an informal caution for saying ‘kill all men’. Where were the defenders of freeze peach when I was deemed ineligible for support because I exercised my right to say whatever I feel? What possible justification did West Midlands Police have for blocking me on social media? The authorities turned their back on me when I needed the law, racism is in fact illegal and a punishable offence. It went by unchallenged though and emboldened racists to escalate their attacks against me.

With every inaction, every no holds barred ‘debate’ on immigration and attacks on people the mainstream can’t stomach; disabled people, trans people, refugees fleeing catastrophes we caused, the proud British racist was given the nod to abuse anyone he doesn’t personally like. He thought the referendum would decide whether or not immigrants would be made to LEAVE, in fact he knew nothing about the EU and our part in it.  The violent racism we have all witnessed the past few days has been picked up because the people with the power to spread information (or misinformation if we’re being honest) decided to publish it on their platforms. They keep the spotlight on it. If they had done the same for Muhsin Ahmed, Mohammed Saleem, Nahid Almanea perhaps we wouldn’t be in this nightmare scenario today.

If Richard Dawkins et al hadn’t been so focused on bashing Muslims at every opportunity, maybe we wouldn’t have been quick to ‘other’ European migrants. If Helen Lewis and her ilk had listened instead of ‘literally not giving a shit’ and monstering, othering and silencing marginalised groups they might have heard how we were suffering for many years before the rise of fascism went mainstream. Heck they might even have tried including us in their ‘debates’ so we could provide a suitable counter argument instead of the circle jerk that is the neoliberal mainstream media. Had David Cameron refrained from making Muslim mums the target for his racist crusades, others may not have seen fit to abuse them too. If Katie Hopkins never existed in the first place brown people wouldn’t have been dehumanised and reduced to vermin in a national newspaper.

Despite the many comparisons on the internet between the ‘journalism’ we are subjected to today and the hate speech which was the norm prior to the Holocaust there were still liberals and lefties calling Godwin and accusing us of attention seeking cos we’re all after a book deal (says a lot about the accusers in my opinion). Various national treasures feigned ignorance, going as far as to defend their use of racial slurs with the argument it is not in fact racist to say the p and n words (John Terry, Prince Harry, Anton du Beke, Jeremy Clarkson, India Knight etc made it commonplace where once it was censored). Theresa May justified her creepy racist van asking foreigners how we could make it easy for them to go home, because the British people insisted it wasn’t racist to talk about immigration controls. She can make even a British person stateless, if they are suspected of ‘terrorism’. Britain First, even after their proven links with Jo Cox’s killer, is not yet referred to as the terrorist militia it clearly is so I can only imagine it will be non whites who live with the threat of statelessness. When you make a person stateless it becomes easier to dehumanise them.

These aren’t projected fears, these behaviours have been identified as dangerous because human behaviour is formulaic. If x happens then y is sure to follow. Human beings have proved again and again, through various historical genocides that ‘othering’, that is to say polarisation of groups, ‘us’ and ‘them’ inevitably leads to dehumanisation then mass killings. On the flipside this means we can prevent atrocities if we are honest about the horrors around us. Try and get an honest answer out of a journalist or politican though and you’ll see why we are condemned to this Tory enabled Brexit wasteland. They’re all in it together, to the detriment of us plebs.

At every twist and turn we have raised flags and pleaded with powerful people to recognise “we have far more in common with each other than that which divides us” (as the late Jo Cox once said) and they responded with control; denying our experiences, denying our very existence and charging on without us, full steam ahead. We’ve been discarded and abandoned for demanding equality. The same people carry on today as though they are innocent of any wrongdoing and as shocked as the rest of us at all the worrying reports.

It is never too late to admit you have white privilege and make amends with those you have wronged. If you cannot humble yourself and put others first, you carry us further down this beaten path of iniquity, still against our will. There are those who’d rather we all perished than relinquish even a little of their power and control, and this thought should frighten us all.

‘Confronting’ random women is called street harassment

All too often I use this blog to rage about all the bastards in the world but today I’m going to engage in some unprecedented activity (like the badass ex Muslim I am) and actually thank some of you for doing your human duty. If I’d had you Twitter treasures on the bus that time I was racially abused I’d probably still feel ok to go out on my own. On that occasion 50 odd people chose to laugh at my pleas for help. They fell on the side of the racist who’d just called me a Paki bitch for ignoring his sexual harassment. The packed top deck of a London bus, in Kilburn, a multicultural area, at 3am, and not one person thought it unacceptable I’d been targeted for racist and sexist harassment. Even the other poc on the bus looked away, a black man shook his head and looked at his feet. Luckily my white best friend was there to slap the offender and stand in his way so he couldn’t actually physically reach me.

doyle

When Matthew Doyle tweeted this, whatever his intentions, he had assumed solidarity from Twitter. The majority of people I follow were still reeling from #StopIslam which was trending in the UK yesterday following the Brussels attacks but it was trending for a reason, a significant number of my fellow citizens/twitterers are in fact white supremacists, even if they do not think of themselves as racist. With this in mind, Doyle tweeted his encounter with a random Muslim woman on the street in which he demanded an explanation for Brussels. What he wasn’t expecting was for common sense to prevail and for people to afford that woman the humanity and dignity each and every single one of us deserves; the right to exist free from harm and collective punishment.

On seeing that tweet my heart fell, my initial reaction isn’t anger as you might expect of me. I ALWAYS feel toxic shame first, a latent trickle of self hate and abject fear, I feel intensely vulnerable, then apprehensive because I was still unsure of how Twitter would react. How many times have we said x is racist only for the fair, well meaning apologists to deny/erase our perspectives? On this occasion though, I felt buoyed by the outright repulsion for this man and his bigoted actions.

Thank you friends, allies, comrades for showing me that there are some of us at least who took on board what it is to be human, that we can be outraged on the behalf of a woman none of us personally know, who might not even exist, because whether she does or not it’s the absolute right thing to do, especially when many more suffer incidents like this in their day to day dealings with the Great British public. Every. Single. Day. Every time there is a terror attack the media reporting provokes/incites a wave of increasingly violent attacks on women like me, because white men like Doyle are too cowardly to pick on someone their own size. He calls himself a feminist and I guess he can; telling Muslim women what to wear *is* the white feminist’s modus operandi, I just wish they’d stop pretending they see us as equals.

On a final note it is worth mentioning that there were still some people on ‘our side’ who thought that tweet wasn’t real or else intended to be a ‘joke’ or *insert well meaning excuse here* just not what we as people of colour say it is. Nice middle class white people, why do you still refuse to listen? People have been murdered in this country for being brown or ‘looking Muslim’ these past few years and still you think we’re just making it up, or overreacting? You cannot tackle a problem until you call it what it is. Doyle tweeted it in all seriousness then backtracked when he realised people were upset but changed his mind again, perhaps galvanised by incoming tweets of racist solidarity.

When you deny the experiences of the people living it, it only gets worse.