It is because I feel

A piece I wrote for @TheFementalists

The Fementalists

Sam blogs at Left at the Lights and tweets at@SamAmbreen

[Content note: Discusses child abuse and racism]

It’s been a while since I locked my bedroom door. There really is no need with just the two of us in this big house but not so long ago, this didn’t matter.  When I was in the room, the door was always locked. I spent 23 hours of a day in this room, the window barely open to let in some fresh air. I knew my aunt was downstairs, running her business, pottering about and this gave me a little comfort, sometimes. Mostly though, I was in on the inside, counting as I inhaled, holding briefly, exhaling for a set amount of time. I spent most of this time trying to remember how to breathe.

View original post 730 more words



  1. the permanent internal shivering (from fear, not meds) combined with forgetting and remembering to breathe…the exhaustion this resulted in. SIGH. Hit the nail on the head with this one.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s