Sex abuse is synonymous with power

CN – Sex Abuse

Another day, another slew of reports on sexual predators facing justice in our criminal justice system, and how some of them evade it. The use of scare quotes for eg can suggest the reporter is scornful of the information being relayed or that it is has struck a chord with them, and is throwing it out there for the reader to make up their own mind. By introducing an element of doubt, by questioning the use of particular words they cast shadows on the validity of the interviewee’s opinion. The mainstream media don’t so much as report the news, or uncover grave injustices, they shape it, they can fashion it out of thin air. How would you know otherwise, unless you were there at the time? You don’t believe everything you read, do you?

20181115_183758‘Committed paedophile’ PC Ian Naude was convicted today of raping a 13 year old girl in the back of his car and filming the attack. He also pleaded guilty to 31 other offences including misconduct in public office and grooming of other teenage girls, one of whom threatened to kill herself. What’s particularly harrowing about this case is how Naude was due to start as a junior officer in 2017 but the process was put on hold when an allegation of rape was made against him. I believe them, and the authorities perhaps should have done too but no further action was taken and the recrutiment process was continued.

Thinking back to my work as a support worker for women fleeing male violence, the standards that must be satisified in order for a case to make it to the CPS are as much about whether or not a victim is telling the truth as they are about evidence against the perpetrator. Surely PC Naude would have been required to undertake a CRB check before he was permitted to interact with members of the public? They take a while to process for non police related professions, about 3 months, but the police have access to multiple systems including POVA and other registers for the protection of vulnerable children and adults they can check before the official papers come back. Odd then that the police authority failed to notice the two child grooming allegations naming him reported to Staffs and West Mercia police in 2017.

A persistent and ‘committed paedophile’, Naude was able to bypass security checks that should have flagged him up as a concern before he was ever recruited. He should never have been allowed to interact with members of the public least of all vulnerable minors who were looking to him for protection. He is not the first and he won’t be the last. The police should just stop expecting the public to trust in them when they cannot guarantee our safety in their presence.

Who can we trust? We can’t trust the police, who seem disproportionately represented in sexual and domestic violence statistics, they offend at a rate 5 times higher than the national average. We can’t trust the media, they spent decades watching and covering up Britain’s nasty treasures, and crawled out of the woodwork post Savile to confirm they had seen it all unfold but that stopped rather abruptly when we turned on them for being such useless complicit witnesses to horrific child abuse. I would suggest it’s one of the reasons they stay focused on Asian grooming gangs. The racist outrage and plots for revenge are all consuming, there’s no space to think about anything else. With propaganda focused on predatory savages, the police, media, government and all their collaborators got a get out of jail free card.

I suppose Lord Lester is so self assured in this scheme he can approach Asian survivors of violence like Jasvinder Sanghera (an inspiration to many women like myself) who founded the Karma Nirvana project in 1993 to provide culturally specific support to women experiencing domestic violence, and promise her a peerage if she slept with him. He groped her and chased her around his kitchen, after offering a place to stay when she missed the last train home. They had been working on changing the law to make forced marriage an offence, back in 2006. I remember that project, I too was involved in a small way when the Asian refuge I was working in invited members of the house of lords to come see the crucial work we were doing with women who had no recourse to public funds. I am utterly disgusted by the revelations that one of ours was being harassed and assaulted by the very people we were appealing to for social justice.


I believe Jasvinder Sanghera. I am not at all surprised however that there are people including Lord Lester himself, saying she is a liar. What kind of a world do we live in when a trusted and upstanding member of a network that protects victims is being framed as dishonest? “I was acutely aware of the power imbalance”, she said “If I’d said anything, who would believe me?” She felt all the same things all victims do, even with her CBE and many awards and accolades. She has waived her right to anonymity because she continues to stand for all women, in every way she can.

She is going to need support, especially as it seems the establishment are doubling down. How on earth do we contend with the all powerful, those with such a blatant disregard for common people, who use their punitive powers to cast aspersions on victims and survivors? Jasvinder herself has said she feels as though she “has been victimised all over again”. Power has asserted itself.

They can frame it however they like, the mainstream media and politicians, we know different. They’ll print an article here, and another there, news they can’t afford to ignore but they won’t join the dots to expose the network, not like they do with Asian grooming gangs. There’s no middle page spread on the privileged establishment old boy networks running through the centre of all public services, because they run all the papers too. They’ll throw the odd working class monster to the dogs, for balance, but won’t ever report on the pervasive and far reaching sickness of familial child abuse, the most common of all sex abuses in the United Kingdom. You are more likely to be raped by your father or brother or uncle than you are ever to come in contact with an Asian grooming gang.

The problem is too huge to take care of one sector at a time. Instead we need a class war and survivors must take the lead.


This is what silencing looks like

They said they might not like what I say but they’d defend to the death my right to say it, except they lied.

Nothing compares to the truth

Sinead O Connor says white people are disgusting and she wants nothing more to do with them and that is her right as a white person and citizen of a country that prides itself on free speech. I’ve lost count of the times I said Pakistanis are disgusting though I have to admit it’s been a fair while since I did. Growing up it was my party trick, to show everyone how much I was not like all the others I’d stroke their egos, demonstrating my eagnerness and willingness to please with my local accent and knowledge of pop culture. I beamed with pride when a random girl on the bus complimented my accent as being so Brummy, you could never tell (that I was a Paki?) and when assorted friends rewarded my compliance, (which often translated into unabashed verbal paki bashing) with praise for how much I was not like all the others, I lapped it up, convinced this endorsement would save me from the racists. I resented it even at the time but I hadn’t fully realised the extent to which I would grow to abhor my own cowardice. I performed like the proverbial monkey, unaware, or perhaps unwilling to recognise the power play, reinforcing my lowly status every time I entered into this dance with my alleged superiors.

When Sinead O’Connor talks about disgusting white people I know who she means. It’s those people I felt compelled to please. I met L when I was 15, as a runaway, isolated, stuck in a rut, desperate for interaction. We were like chalk and cheese and not in that good opposites attract way. Up until my escape I’d been a straight A student and prided myself on learning and bettering myself. I had to dumb myself down so L wouldn’t feel like I was showing off. She was aggressive, using her body to push you where she wanted you. She wasn’t particularly big, just white. It was a feature of our friendship, to constantly reiterate how I’d managed to do well for myself, being friends with these white people on a council estate in Northolt when my folks were so alien and unworthy. She wasn’t the last white person to make me feel this way, I almost married another one. He said very early on in our relationship that he would only say it once but I might be smarter than him. I guess I could have spoken up, if I wasn’t paralysed from fear at the time, when he barked up my street at 3am it was his country and he’d talk as loud as he’d like, when I asked him to keep it down because people were sleeping. I was disgusted with his behaviour but didn’t locate my backbone until the relationship ended and I could finally be honest with myself. In the end I was grateful for the lesson, how white people will use a single person of colour to shield themselves against accusations of racism, all the while exerting unchecked white privilege to say and do as they please with no consequences.

These white people behaved in disgusting ways, and they are by no means the exception. When I said Pakistanis were disgusting I was reacting to the microaggressions we absorb as soon as we are able to verbalise. The racialised system of deserving and undeserving which places Pakistanis at the very bottom, in Asia but also the world. We are a slur weaponised against all South Asians, even non Asian Muslims. I had the impression Pakistani men were the most lecherous, the most violent, until I started working in domestic violence services. It was a long process but once I had made the decision to let the veil drop I was coasting. It was so much easier for me to be anti racist, to listen and go with my gut. So much less stress. Of course this means conflict is almost a permanent feature of my life but I’m nobody’s bitch. Being your own person of colour, respecting your past and acknowledging the hurdles your ancestors took for you to exist today, that’s empowering. Shaking the white gaze away from your eyes to see the strength of character and sheer bloody mindedness it took to survive the barbaric British empire, when it set out to destroy our cultures and peoples and very nearly succeeded, is catharthic and goes a little way to heal the fractures in our psyche.

I no longer think of Pakistanis as disgusting but broken and doing the best we can. We were and still are treated disgustingly by disgusting people wearing whiteness like armour against criticism of their inhumane and savage treatment of non whites. If you’re white and you found Ms O’Connor’s comments disgraceful consider the following:

You are a racist. A revisionist. A liar. A fake.

I thank Sinead O’Connor for having the courage to speak up in these threatening times. By making herself a target she takes some of the heat off the usual punching bags, and gives marginalised people everywhere a smidgen of hope that things are slowly changing, the world is righting itself.

White Supremacy Kills Jews

The police have launched an investigation into allegations of antisemitism in the Labour Party, an extraordinary feat considering they are usually too frightened to do anything about other pressing societal issues like establishment child sex abuse (lest they upset the ethnics for their cultural practices) and tory electoral fraud, which is oh so politically sensitive (and might get them sacked). A dossier was handed to the police by an LBC journalist, those bastions of anti racist activism. I’ve tried to report racism to the cops before but been on the wrong end of a white supremacist agenda and somehow ended up being warned for my political beliefs, because I could kill all the men without batting an eyelid, obviously.

It’s been almost a week since I was suspended from Twitter for calling a white supremacist a dirty rat. I haven’t stopped thinking about the 11 Jewish elders brutally murdered by a white supremacist. Robert Bowers, a white American male reported to have an online presence demonstrating a “vitriolic hatred of Jewish people and other bigotry” has pleaded not guilty to the murder of his 11 victims and although we all know he did it, recovering as he is from the multiple gunshots he sustained in the showdown with Pittsburgh police, in which a couple of officers were also injured, Bowers most likely believes he can get away with it. In what world could a man of colour shoot 11 people to death and injure law enforcement but still escape with their life intact, free to claim up is down an blame someone else for his barbaric actions? Not in this white man’s world. But Bowers is going to have a go. His white privilege will protect him, it has so far.

The white supremacist establishment have made themselves clear; racism against black and brown people does not exist but antisemitism is criminal behaviour. This will hurt Jews ultimately but 84% do not care about that currently, so long as those socialist bastards don’t get in. I wonder if the 84% are willing to consider a white supremacist killed 11 Jews because he is white and Jews are a threat to white supremacy. No? Not even out of respect for memory? Or personal safety? Of the 84% of Jews afraid of Corbyn’s socialist vision for all ethnicities, how many would consider themselves white? How many are European? How many are white passing?

Surely an interesting study to undertake given the implications of such an investigation by the police? That the people who suffer most as a result of ethno-religious conflict in Britain today is its minority of white passing Jews? Just not Muslims. Or travellers. Or black people. What an unpredictable twist. And by that I mean predictably twisted and untrue.

Gnasher Jew Emboldened Nazis

I am a survivor of child abuse. I am a survivor of multiple attempts to assault me, from the ages of 10 onwards. I have dedicated my life to ending sex abuse, and have been committed to it in my work and beyond. This is the kind of thing that is designed to trigger my CPTSD and harm me. I have no idea who this freak is.

Screenshot_20181030-165230_Samsung Internet

My family is split in to two camps, those who want to report familial abusers to the police and those who do not. The mother of my nephews falls into the latter camp. I am estranged from their mother, my twin sister, because she will not acknowledge the sex abuse I was subjected to, because it will impact on her life. That is all. She’s selfish. To suggest that I am a sex abuser, these people are telling me they want me to die. They want me to kill myself. The trauma of being targeted and not believed my entire life is being weaponised by these fucking monsters to kick me when I’m down. And Gnasher Jew enabled that. They don’t care about racism, only power. They don’t care about doing the right thing, they will happily cheer on my suicide if it means Labour do not win.


I will tell people to vote Corbyn with my dying breath because it means smashing the likes of these to smithereens. So it’s victimhood when I object to being called a Paki but Fasher Jew got me suspended for calling him a rat?


They are actually talking about Kiwi Farms as though they know and appreciate the Nazis who run the forum. They’re threatening people on their behalf. THIS is who the Jewish community has to look up to? No wonder there’s been so much distrust, so much bad blood. These people are not giving Jews a very good name. In fact, I would condemn them, if they were Muslims speaking on my behalf, I would clarify they do not operate in my name. They are fascists, they are monsters. They know no boundaries.


I am an antifascist. I don’t know know what Gnasher Jew were doing in 2013 but I was standing with my comrades of multiple races and denominations against fascists who threatened our communities. I would never use nazi information, even against an enemy. That’s because I don’t TRUST Nazis. I take it as read they are venomous and most likely bullshitting. What kind of anti racist uses a Nazi forum as a reputable source?


Gnasher and pals gloating after they had me suspended. If Twitter reinstates my account, you’ll see all the evidence for yourself.


(Update: I reported the libellous tweet to Twitter who said it did not violate their standards. I was suspended for calling someone a rat but this freakshow says I’m a child rapist and that’s fine?)

Gnasher Jew the White Supremacist

Last night at around 3am my account was suspended by Twitter

I was reported by Gnasher Jew and their followers after I called them out for misrepresenting the truth with regards to the devastating terrorist murder of 11 Jewish seniors at the hands of a white supremacist. This detail is in fact very important and I was attempting to underline it for Gnasher, who seemed to struggle with the truth, as ever unrelenting in their campaign to slander Labour as somehow the inspiration behind a white supremacist’s attack on Jewish people in the US, they deliberately left out the bit that recognised the murderer was a white supremacist, instead using this tragic incident in a cynical move to score points against their political opponents. Their followers quickly piled on.


(Note the dehumanising use of ‘it’, particularly pertinent given the reasons for my suspension)

It had not escaped my attention in the past, links between Gnasher and various far right terrorist organisations and hate figures. For a group concerned with Jewish rights they have an awful lot of fascist friends and when I put this to them I was asked for proof. I set about about obliging them (search for Brexit Tory, one of their nearest and dearest supporters) but then I saw they had linked to Kiwi Farms. In a bid to mine my personal information, Gnasher had picked a nazi forum full of incels awash with antisemitism, Islamophobia and and some of the most horrific descriptions of sexual violence, not only about their targets ie people like me, but minors. The have threatened to rape and kill me and doxed my family and Gnasher Jew made that information available to their 18000 followers.

Anyone with an ounce of awareness knows that Kiwi Farms is a stomping ground for some of the most vicious and violent white supremacists, threatening the kind of violence that’ll make you shake. Mumsnet on speed? Yeah, if Mumsnet like to threaten to rape vulnerable adults and give Muslims a good genocide. You’re right not to want to go back to a site that calls anyone a Paki, Martin mate, it’s usually a sign they’re fascists.

Perhaps that is why Gnasher had my account suspended, because my timeline last night was all the proof anyone needed of Gnasher being aligned with a neo nazi white supremacist site that targets vulnerable people for their mental illnesses. They were discussing it like it is a reputable source for them, that they believe the slander that is second nature for these depraved criminals.

Who looks at a site that says this known activist is a terrorist, a paedophile and god knows what else and uses it ‘expose’ them instead of reporting it to the police? If I am all of these things then surely you need to report me? No, instead it was like Gnasher and friends, formerly friends of Labour, were actually legit best friends of neo nazis Kiwi Farms. Apparently there are Jews on there too. Odd considering Joshua Moon has often spoken about how he wants to collect Jew fingers.

How horrifying, that a front for antiracism and prevention of antisemitism would rely on a white supremacist site that is responsible for the murder of two students after William Aitchison, a forum member, shot them to death at a high school in New Mexico? Other forum members have been investigated for their attacks against Jo Cox’s widower, whom they targeted following her murder, by one of their kind. Aitchison had formerly shared his intent to commit a mass murder on the site and was encouraged by its admin and other shit posters. They have been implicated in the suicide of at least three more, Julie Terryberry was just 18 when she was goaded to suicide by Kiwi Farms members, Chloe Sagal self immolated because she felt it was the only thing she could do, to express her distress. It is perhaps even more worrying there are people who purport to know Joshua Moon with links to Gnasher. I’m not at all surprised that someone with those particular flags in their avi is defending the likes of Moon, there is a toxic white supremacist patriarchal feel about Gnasher.

I have always stood in solidarity with my Jewish siblings. I always will, but Gnasher strikes me as the enemy. When I said he was a rat, I meant him specifically, for being a dirty rat and muddying the waters. A white supremacist killed 11 religiously conservative Jewish elders for the fact they were assisting Muslims refugees to settle in America. That is a very significant and important point. White supremacists hate Jewish Muslim solidarity. There are Jewish white supremacists just like there are Muslim white supremacists. Gnasher is a white supremacist front. They objected to me highlighting the white supremacy that informed the attack on the Tree of Life synagogue. They couldn’t believe I would dare to draw a line between them and the white supremacists attacking Muslims and Jews. If Gnasher really cared about antisemitism they’d be honest about the threat from far right white supremacists instead of attributing that violence to socialists. They wouldn’t use antisemitism to further marginalise woc like me or degrade it by using it dishonestly. Look at his followers for  chrissakes:

And that’s why I called him a rat. He knows this which is why it is so underhanded of him to suggest I was conducting myself in a violent manner. They weren’t afraid of me, they were just appalled at my temerity, that I did not back down like a good little brown girl and they proved they have power, by having me suspended.

I’m not going to appeal it. I am fucking done with nazi site Twitter. It is and always has been a platform for white supremacists. It proves it time and time again.


Twitter doesn’t care about Suicide

A few days ago I was sent this tweet by @seanlfc82 


I tried to report it to Twitter but cancelled because of the way they have set it up.

When you report someone for inciting/encouraging self harm or suicide, Twitter chooses to focus on the target of the abuse as opposed to the abuser. As someone who has been locked out of their account for suicidal ideation, for pondering whether death is the only option in a world skewed towards abusers, I felt like I was being victimised again by Twitter for daring to report the perpetrator. I backspaced a couple of times to see whether there was another option and eventually reported him for threatening violence or physical harm.

Twitter has previously locked me out of my account for a week for telling a nazi to eat his own wiener. I got locked out for a week again recently when I told a nazi to die spontaneously and stop infecting the gene pool. My hyperbolic retorts are serious enough to censor me for a week each time but actual nazis cheerleading for Hitler and telling people with mental health issues/known suicidal ideation to kill themselves is acceptable and barely gets a slap on the wrist.


@SeanLFC82  suggested I hang myself because I dared to object to the racist narrative being constructed around the toddler who was seriously hurt in an acid attack in Worcester (it was later confirmed they were of Eastern European descent, not that it made the slightest bit of difference to fascists like Sean).


Perhaps if Twitter hadn’t made such an impassioned plea concern trolling for my mental health I wouldn’t be so bothered by their hypocrisy and gaslighting. Encouraging others to suicide/self harm should be a permanent ban, a zero tolerance policy for the dredges of society but it’s a known tactic of Nazis, to goad survivors to suicide. It’s what they’re proud of, over at Kiwifarms. Of course Twitter isn’t going to implement anything that would hurt Nazis chances of success, they need every little bit of help they can get.


Twitter doesn’t care if I kill myself, it’s just a handy tool to punish vulnerable people. It gives them the space to say they are well meaning and striving to keep us all safe when in actual fact, the way it makes a suicidal person feel, to be locked out of your account like you have done something wrong, to be isolated from followers who could actually help, to be told Twitter cares even though it is demonstrating the complete opposite; these are just attempts to destabilise the resistance using the Dummies Guide to Humanity, how to appear human and caring enough to hold on to your privilege i.e neoliberal bullshittery.


I’d go so far as saying he’s a Nazi, Seth. A nazi who has no choice but to let non nazis use his platform, it being a global phenomenon that has many streams of revenue, but he’s going to make it as difficult as possible for us. It doesn’t just *seem* like nazis have free run of the playground of racist ideas, they actually do.

Twitter’s suicide policy is straight up virtue signalling, a phrase coined by white supremacists who do exactly that for kudos or money. It hurts survivors.